i love you not.

[tre]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=cellSpacing,0,true][atrb=cellPadding,0,true][atrb=background,http://i54.tinypic.com/219qg76.jpg][scrolly:h(300),w(271),sy] He kept his head hung low and ears laced back against his dappled skull. Blue eyes shifted under a furrowed brow, searching for anything out of place. The birds sang their song and the clouds above were parting for the first time in weeks. The beautiful day only made his mood worse; he wanted everyone to be as unhappy as he was. Growling he glared up at the heavens, then quickly diverted his gaze. The males lip quivered into a malicious snarl revealing a glimpse of pearly canines underneath. The hurt and anger was eating away at Vegas, bite by little bite, he was losing himself… Although Hayley had been missing from his life for four months, she invaded every thought, dream, even his nightmares. For as much as Vegas wanted his life to be normal again, to be able to live without her, to move on, even if moving on did not mean finding another love; Vegas enjoyed the idea that she was still very much a part of him. It was this kind of thinking that was slowly destroying him. The fear of never being able to hold Hayley again resulted in Vegas refusing to let go of her memory. [/scrolly]

Super crappeh post, but bear with me. I'm trying to post faster than longer... I have perfectionism issues...long story. Plus it'll get better the more we get into the thread. ^^

[H.ostile]

RUSSIA
, THE STARS LEAN DOWN TO KISS YOU

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Giant paws seemed to skip along the slick, moss covered rocks. Today was, well, better than usual. She could even consider being a bit cheery- if it hadn't been for the terrible location Vegas had chosen to meet her in. He seemed to be making Russia's life a living Hell now that his precious gem was long gone. Big deal, was all she could bring herself to say when learning about Hayley's terrible death. She wasn't want to hand out sympathy like playing cards, and besides, feeling sorry for others didn't come too easily when you'd had the worst of the worst happen to you. Russia looked up towards the breaking clouds, a heavy sigh drowning out any bird chirping. Like marshmallows in the coffee. The sun was shining, the birds singing peachy melodies, impressing others with their always-in-sync voices.

She got up from her sitting positon, forcing herself back into the present. Not now. She couldn't think about them at the moment, there could only be one thing on the mind. You see, not only was Russia a terrible multi-tasker, but lately she'd been thinking about her family too often. She grasped on to the little things about them, afraid that if she wasn't giving their memories her undivided attention they might suddenly disappear. Many a times she'd been told to forget and forgive, the past was the past and you can't go back. But Russia was tired of hearing the same old bullshit, day after day. She wanted to go back, had to go back. Would it make things okay again? Probably not.

She held no expression on her face, which was becoming very common lately. Instead, she moved towards the speckled canine, trying to look into his gorgeous blue eyes. He reminded her of Rosco; her former mate. Not that she had any feelings for Vegas, I mean, she'd never truly loved someone after the unfortunate accident. But he held close.. closer spot to her heart. She sat back on golden brown haunches once more, curving her tail perfectly around her curvy body. Giving him a lopsided grin, looking at him from the tops of her eyes, she nodded slowly. ''Sir.''

[/b]Her voice held no respect, almost teasing if anything. Not only did she refuse to to be submissive to any male, but she blamed everyone for her family's unforgettable deaths. Even the innocent were to blame.

Her black whiskers twitched slightly as she focused on the background, heat waves rising. Why the Hell would he choose this place? Didn't he see how big she was? This body fat wasn't meant to keep her cold in hot areas. Her eyes darted back to his body, long tongue rolling out like a red carpet. Russia brought herself up on all four, moving away from him. ''You look, well.. better.'' She snickered, taking pride in her insult. He couldn't bitch at her, considering she'd covered the insult what she would easily argue was a compliment. Her hips shook more than usual as she pranced around the mucky area, careful not to lift her back paws too high up to make sure not to get any mud on her coat. ''I see you've been keeping up with your appearance, at least.''She gave him a hungry growl, prowling over to him.[/color][/blockquote][/blockquote][/blockquote]

, AND I LIE AWAKE AND MISS YOU

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[tre]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=cellSpacing,0,true][atrb=cellPadding,0,true][atrb=background,http://i54.tinypic.com/219qg76.jpg][scrolly:h(300),w(271),sy] Black leathery nose wrinkled at the scent of her drawing nearer, and mingled with the humidity of the land, she was sickly sweet this time of year. Vegas did not know what attracted him to Russia to begin with, but he assumed that she was sort of a replacement for him. He had other bitches that he slept around with, but Russia held a special place in his heart. Too bad for her, Vegas did not love her in the same way that he did his late wife; therefore he did not care much for her wishes, particularly today. Vegas seen the Eurasian nearly every day, she belonged to the Brotherhood…but it was rare that they met on one of his increasingly rarer good days. Matter of fact, he practically avoided her and any of his other female companions on those days, afraid that if he did, he might find something more intriguing about them other than their good looks. If he ever allowed himself to fall for someone else, meaning replacing Hayley infinitely… The idea made him shudder. He could never replace her. He never wanted to forget her. Dappled ears lifted at the sound of her voice, his body was still rather rigid. Straightening his posture some, his eyes followed her every move raising a single brow that seemed to soften his tense features. He was mildly entertained by her wanderings, although her second comment forced him to shoot her a dangerous look, one of warning. He was not in the mood for her pompous attitude no matter how miniscule it was in comparison to his own. Normally her back handed comments would slide off like water on a ducks back. He had heard the same rumors everyone else did about her life before the Brotherhood, but no one knew to what extent she had been hurt. Frankly, to Vegas, it did not matter where she came from, or what had happened to her… As long as she gave him what he wanted in the end, he would do his best control his anger, but he couldn’t make any guarantees. “You don’t look so bad yourself…” he purred, his body beginning to relax a tiny bit. He stood where he was, alluring her to come to him. Her growl was such a turn on he felt a paign down in groin. “Oh Rush…” he moaned, knowing that once he got inside, all thoughts of her would fade away. The orgasm would alleviate a lot of tension he had been feeling today. He prodded his nose in places where it did not belong, searching out her most potent places; although once there, he found something he was not expecting. He pulled away so fast, one might of thought he received an electrical shock. Hackles raised defiantly, a snarl quickly contorting his handsome features, he nipped at Russia’s rump. “Whore!” he bellowed, furious with his discovery. The scent of the dog she was with the night before was still on her. Even though Vegas had never officially claimed Russia for his own, all of his brother’s knew of his interest in the female, and therefore did not pursue; in a way, making her his. [/scrolly]

[H.ostile]

RUSSIA
, THE STARS LEAN DOWN TO KISS YOU

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She leaped back in surprise, a small feeling of guilt sweeping through her before she dismissed it. Russia pulled back her lips in a threatening snarl, looking him directly in the eyes. '' Oh, and I suppose I'm the bad guy here? How many girls do you sleep with a night? How many of those girls aren't me?'' Her eyes seemed to lighten a bit, her face turning into a sad picture. She'd look away from him, sitting on her haunches. Her snout reached down delicately, her tongue licking off everyones' scent.

Russia brought her head up to the sky, using any excuse to not have to look him in the eyes. ''You expect me to wait for you, Vegas, but I won't do it any longer. I mean, what kind of relationship do we have going here? Meet in abandoned places so we can fuck? Yeah- thanks, but no thanks.''

And then her expression would change again, this time a corner of her mouth rising to show amusement. Dragging herself towards him, Russia craned her neck so that her mouth would come straight to his ears. Russia let out a sharp moan, ending it with words. ''Besides, he already satisfied me.''

, AND I LIE AWAKE AND MISS YOU

[/size]
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[tre]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=cellSpacing,0,true][atrb=cellPadding,0,true][atrb=background,http://i54.tinypic.com/219qg76.jpg][scrolly:h(300),w(271),sy] Eyes narrowed with a sick gratification that he had called her out, and she felt bad about it. He wanted to hurt her, to bring her down to her lowest level. Her snarl did not surprise him in the least. She was full of fire and her own kind of suffering; it was attractive to Vegas when he was in the right mood. It made the sex better when they were both hurting on the inside. Besides, it would not be that fun for him if she just gave in to his battering of her ethics. Although, as she turned the tables on him; berating him with the truth of his actions, he felt a wave of guilt his own. He hated who he was becoming. He hated the cheating, lying, and the sleeping around. It was never who he was, or who meant to be. After Hayley had died, he tried to go on with his life, but he just couldn’t. The path his life was leading now was the easy way out, the only way he knew he could survive the loss of his soul mate. It was a life were a good time meant a brief period of time that he was able of suppress the memories of Hayley and their lives together. He avoided all eye contact with Russia. How could he face her? She knew him to well. What could he say to her? She was completely right. There was nothing he could say to defend himself. His ears loped to the side and his posture slumped, he felt defeated. There was a silence between the two, and then Russia’s personality changed a third time. The sound of her drawing nearer piqued his interest. There was something in her walk that alerted him, her foot falls were lighter, happier… Curious he turned his head slightly in her direction, blue eyes weary of her next move. And then it came, the insult he had not expected. “How dare you talk to me that way!!” he roared, lashing out at her with fang and nail. Angry jaws searched for her shoulder and tender flesh, but mostly found a mouthful of fur. Growling disappointedly he lashed out again, this time for her face and neck; a place less guarded by two or three layers of hair. He grabbed her cheek and began to toss his head. Once she was off balance, he released his grip on her face, and shoved his body into her, sending her tumbling across the ground. He began to pace back and forth, growling and huffing irritably. “How dare you!?” he spat again. “Who took you in? Who takes care of you? Hell if it weren’t for me-“ he ended short with a scoff and turned away from her. “You’re pathetic, you know that?” he paused, glancing at her. “Do you not realize who I am?” he asked, quieting his voice. “Do you not realize what I can do to you?” he said in a tone just above a whisper. Dappled ears fell back against his head, his hackles rising along his spine he took a couple steps towards her. [/scrolly]

[H.ostile]

RUSSIA
, THE STARS LEAN DOWN TO KISS YOU

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It all happened too fast; one minute she was turned on by Vegas's submissive behavior, defeated attitude, but in the next minute she was losing her footing-falling. She laid on the ground, shocked that he'd just did that to her. Sure, he shot her warning glances. But he never laid a hand on her, and that's what made Russia feel different. Other females got their share of hittings, but Vegas never so much as touched her in a bad way. Now, here he was throwing her fragile body around as if it were a doll.

Russia looked up at him, anger in her eyes. She surpressed the tears, instead letting out a shrill cry of hatred. Russia stood up slowly, bringing up her right paw- afraid it was broken. She'd start to whine loudly, her voice breaking mid-whine. ''It's broken. My paw. My lead paw. Broken.'' She started to collapse, she could feel her bones weakening, muscles tiring. But then time stopped. Slowly, Russia's gaze reached for Vegas's. Her eyes widened a little, her canine teeth starting to look sharper than usual. One eye even seemed to twitch, trying to narrow widen at the same time. Nails dug into the ground to keep herself from attacking him. She wouldn't fight him, it wouldn't prove anything. She didn't want to hurt him like he just hurt her, she cared for him too much to do anything that stupid. Instead, her voice was quiet- shakey, barely audible. ''Y-you.. You did this to me. You hurt me, Vegas. Look what you've done. You did this..'' Her voice broke off, tears in her eyes.

She seemed to hobble towards him, no, passed him. She shoved him out of the way with her shoulder, growling softly. ''I do know what you can do to me. Sometimes it's the butterflies in my stomach, the feeling that I'm floating and it only happens when I see you. Other times I just want to beat you, beat you until you believe I'm Hayley. But we both know that's not possible, I will never be a Hayley. I'm.. I'm leaving the Brotherhood, Vegas.'' She talked while she walked, her head turned away from him. Goodbyes were always the hardest.

, AND I LIE AWAKE AND MISS YOU

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[tre]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=cellSpacing,0,true][atrb=cellPadding,0,true][atrb=background,http://i54.tinypic.com/219qg76.jpg][scrolly:h(300),w(271),sy] He made a noise that sounded something like a hiss. Although he was still snarling, his mouth seemed to be upturned into a smile, elated that she was broken, not necessarily physically, but definitely glad that she had given up, broken down mentally and emotionally. It was the exact result he was searching for. Then as she began to express her pain, and lay out the blame of her potentially broken paw, Vegas began to feel a little queasy, unsure of how he was feeling anymore. He kept up a stern façade, one that was less than impressed with her theatrics, but softer than earlier. She was probably faking it anyway; as part of a plan to get his sympathy, to trap him and then attack him when he was close and not predicting anything. Yes! That must have been her plan! Though as she struggled to her feet, and he caught sight of the gleam that was tears in her eyes… He silently cursed himself for thinking the ladder. It stung his heart to see Russia cry. He had never hurt her before, at least not intentionally. He cared for her deeply. Sad blue eyes watched her intently, easily picking out her limp. He didn’t want to look, ashamed of what he had done; but he couldn’t move, he couldn’t force himself to look away. Her shove, although weak, easily set him off balance, causing him to side-step so he didn’t fall over completely. His legs felt numb, he didn’t bother to hold himself still. Allowing her to walk by, his head sunk down to his legs. Dappled ears flicked back towards the retreating female, listening to her argument whole heartedly. Then she said it, her name…a name he hadn’t heard spoken aloud since her death. Suddenly, a voice invaded his brain, putting Russia in the background for a second. “Vegas dear… Make it better…” He was completely stunned. Flabbergasted. Speechless. It was like she was right there next to him. He did not know what to do with himself. He wanted her to keep talking to him. He missed her voice with every fiber of his being. Momentarily he forgot about Russia, until her voice came back with force, practically yelling at him compared to the faint whisper of his deceased mate. Straightening up, he looked around frantically for the golden female. “Rush wait!” Leaping to her side he brusquely stepped in front of her. “Please…” he whined. “I’m so sorry! Please forgive me!” he continued, eyes pleading with her. [/scrolly]

[H.ostile]

RUSSIA
, THE STARS LEAN DOWN TO KISS YOU

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Only for a moment's notice did her eyes soften, revealing how she truly felt underneath. But Russia's expression would harden, lines of age and frustration clearly visible on her forehead. Her almond colored eyes stared upwards at his pleading, ocean blue ones. Russia held back the sharp comments, a snicker held on her tongue. He looked downright pathetic right now, but she figured now wasn't the best of times to say so. Instead, she'd pull her ears back to touch the fur of her head- looking away from him. ''You've broken my lead paw, and I won't be hunting for some time, for this you will not be forgiven so easily and you best be praying that it heals. But I will stay, for the sake of the others.''

Her body twitched, and she brought her eyes back to his own, no longer hard but somewhat softer. A small cough broke the silence, a harsh cough at that- signaling she was getting a cold, and then a sneeze would follow. Whining softly Russia pushed her head into his chest roughly, letting her full weight fall against him. She licked at his neck tenderly, being careful not to use her damaged foreleg. Russia brought her legs up under her body, ready to sleep right then and there.

, AND I LIE AWAKE AND MISS YOU

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[tre]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=cellSpacing,0,true][atrb=cellPadding,0,true][atrb=background,http://i54.tinypic.com/219qg76.jpg][scrolly:h(300),w(271),sy] Vegas knew he must have looked like a fool; his behavior flip-flopping between angry and mild contentedness. He couldn’t keep himself in check anymore with Russia. She made him crazy, and not always in a good way. There were times the two would get together and he found her passion thrilling, stunning. Though he would never admit it to himself, the sex with Russia at times was better than what he could remember with Hayley. One night while lying next to Rush after a heated romp, he’d pondered this idea and come to the conclusion that he and Hayley were fire and ice; they balanced each other out. When they made love it was sweet and about reconnecting with each other. For he and Rush, each was just trying to forget a lost love. They were fire and fire, competing with one another for the oxygen to live. Their relationship was torture on both parties, but neither could part. Each would threaten to leave forever, that they were better without the other just to see them begin to break down and fall apart. Fire and fire; feeding off the weakness of each other. Each wanted to share their pain, but not in the traditional way. They wanted to see the pain of parting. It was cruel, but for the two, it worked to some degree. Here they were again, Russia consuming the air around them while Vegas begged for her to let his fire live. As she turned away from him as she spoke, he craned his neck, trying to watch her expression, hoping for a chance to read her. Taking a slow step forward she turned back to him, her eyes softer, deeper. He sighed lightly, having realized that he had been holding his breath. “Rush. Baby,” he moaned, wanting to tell her that everything would be okay, though as she stepped into him he paused, feeling relieved that he had been forgiven for the time being. He cradled her in his chest, his skin burning under his fur at her touch. Her sweet and tender kisses made his heart leap and stomach churn with anxiety. Salmon-hued tongue mirrored hers; lapping at any part of her he could reach in the awkward position he was in with her under his chin. Between kisses he spoke softly, “I’ll do anything to make it better. Anything. Just forgive me please. You know me better than that. I’d never meant to hurt you like that… I’m so sorry.” Reluctantly he pulled away so he could look her in the eyes, his face serious enough to express his sincerity, but tender with the words he spoke. “I don’t ever want you to leave. I need you here…” pausing for a second, catching his breath at the sight of her beauty. She sure was a gorgeous creature, even with the lines of pain marking her face. “Rush, baby… You know I love you,” he whispered, pulling himself back into her touch. Resting his chin on her head he winced. It wasn’t the first time he told her that, but both knew that it was only half true. He couldn’t honestly and fully love her while he was still deeply in love with Hayley. “Let me show you how much…” he growled, hungry for her passion again. [/scrolly]